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observations from the hellbound handbasket

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Tuesday, October 14th, 2008
1:13 pm - Brushing the fringes of fame
Today I got a call from some guy in Canada who works for the show Battlestar Galactica in some sort of accounting capacity.  We serviced one of their printers at an office here in SoCal, and he needed us to fax over a copy of a standard tax document in order to issue payment.   I told him I would send it to him, but only if he revealed the identity of the final Cylon.  Apparently they train their staff to resist that kind of blackmail because the bastard wouldn't tell me.   I was forced to send the document anyway, or face the full force of the Internal Revenue Service's righteous wrath.

I bet he doesn't know anyway, but he acted like he did.  What a jerk.

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1:03 pm - Alien contact, in Alabama no less

Apparently some psychic has predicted that a huge alien ship will visit us at some point today.  It sparked off enough betting that English bookies have suspended gambling on alien contact.

Link

As we all know, psychics are rarely wrong, so its probably time to prepare for the coming of our new alien masters.  Of course they claim to come in "love", but then you would expect that from a bunch of slavering, tentacled monstrosities hoping to catch us unawares and enslave us all.   I'm just glad they've chosen to appear over Alabama, since it can be nuked as much as necessary with no real damage to anything that matters.   And of course, if nuking them doesn't work, we can only hope they didn't come here for some stupid reason, like those moron lizards from V who travelled untold lightyears to steal our water instead of mining their own system's comets and icy moons.  Worst reason to invade ever.

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Saturday, October 11th, 2008
11:05 am - A wedding destroyed in seconds

 


 

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Thursday, October 9th, 2008
9:18 am - More like the Diet Coke of Wrath

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Tuesday, October 7th, 2008
8:18 pm - What do you suppose "that one" really means to McCain

 

 

So....just petulant old guy being old and crotchety, or something deeper?

Either way, it was unbecoming.  But then McCain was a POW so its probably OK.

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8:06 pm - Post debate reaction that has nothing to do with the actual debate

Can we please, please, for the love of God, stop interviewing these undecided voters and hanging on their every imbecilic, indecisive word.  I can't stand listening to them anymore.  Frankly, in the face of all thats going on in the world and the myriad opportunities even squirrels have had at this point to be exposed to these two candidates and their views, if you still can't make up your mind your opinion is utterly and completely worthless.  Furthermore, you probably shouldn't operate heavy machinery or sit in the emergency exit row of airplanes, because you lack the kind of decision making abilities that even a jellyfish is capable of. 

Seriously, are they like this in real life?  Do they stand paralyzed in grocery stores pondering the relative merits of one ketchup over another?  When confronted with the choice of "new car smell" or "pine" at the carwash, do they need months of public debate and discourse before they pull the fragrance hammer?  What the hell more  do these people need to hear?  Are they waiting for the magic leprechauns to come and mark your ballot for them? 

Honestly, I'm disturbed that they even have the opportunity to vote.  I think it diminishes all of us, and I never, ever want to see another panel of these spineless morons assembled by the networks who then subsequently hang on their every moronic word.

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4:10 pm - Just say yes to drugs

As part of an ongoing company tradition, I got to try a new and interesting drug today at work.  It doesn't happen often, but when somebody gets prescribed something mildy interesting by their doctor, we generally share.  It makes up for the fact that we don't have a company picnic or Christmas party.  Most of the experimentation has been confined to the benzodiazapine family, and this was no exception.

Anyway, I now know what clonazepam feels like.  Its basically an anti-anxiety drug, and the best description for its effects that I can come up with is "relaxed and floaty".  It didn't last very long, at least for me.  Now we have to get a doctor to give one of us valium, and we'll have covered most of the benzo family.

Of course, no doctor ever prescribes anything fun or interesting for me.  All I get is the occasional antibiotic, and they don't have any recreational potential at all. 

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4:08 pm - Ender's Game is now a Marvel comic

io9's got the first ten pages up as a preview.

Link
 

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3:22 pm - The National Debt is over $10 trillion
Its grown so large it no longer fits on the debt clock in NY.



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10:05 am - Well I guess thats it
Now that the world is melting down around us and a new economic Dark Age seems to be in the offing, its probably time to get religion.   It couldn't hurt, after all, and who knows, maybe this is a sign of the end times?  Even the Maya agree with my grandparents about the world ending soon, although they differ greatly in the manner of its destruction.  Still, I for one am not to proud to call upon supernatural forces to aid us, in this our time of need.  As long as we're talking about decent, christian supernatural forces, and not some heathen nonsense like Buddha or Allah or whatever the hell it is Madonna is worshipping at the moment.


Dibs on the Starry Crown.

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Monday, October 6th, 2008
9:10 am - Six months of sun



More here.

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Thursday, October 2nd, 2008
9:31 am - How incredibly cool



This was a National Geographic project to photograph right whales in New Zealand.  Apparently this one was studying back.  "'It looked at me with great curiosity,' Handler [the diver in the picture] says. 'No aggression.'"

Some other beautiful shots here.

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9:17 am - The best explanation of the bail out I've seen yet

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Wednesday, October 1st, 2008
10:04 am - As if further proof of Fox's agenda were needed...


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Tuesday, September 30th, 2008
10:32 am - Octopus love

 

 

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Monday, September 29th, 2008
8:31 pm - National woe

Its kind of hard to be optomistic lately, what with the daily reports of economic ruin and political idiocy, and once again we find ourselves casting around for someone to blame as the Republic crumbles around us.

So who's your scapegoat of choice? 

Personally I blame the freakin' Baby-boomers.  Born at the halcyon of U.S. power, wealth and influence, they spent their lives partying like teenagers with out of town parents, constantly catering to their basest instincts while "searching for themselves" in a never ending quest for immediate gratification.  The 60's naive psychedelic partying, the coke-fueled sexual freedom disco of the 70's, the 80's yuppie greed fest....they had all the fun with basically no consequences, and once they got a hold of the national credit card, all bets were off.  Now the cows have come home to roost, as it were, and we, their children are stuck with not only cleaning the place up, but also paying the bill for their 40 year long party while simultaneously trying to somehow find a way to fund their Social Security, knowing all the while it won't be their for us.  Way to go boomers!   I mean, its not true of all of them, and of course they're our parents and we love them and everything, but it might have been nice if they could have somehow not completely destroyed the country before handing it over to us.

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8:26 pm - Proof that God hates soccer


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9:56 am - Another space first

Space X, after a couple of failed attempts, succeeded in launching the first privately built space craft into Earth orbit.  Their launch costs are considerably lower than the government options currently available, and assuming their design continues to perform, it could open up space to a lot of companies and institutions that wouldn't normally be able to afford it. 

The footage is absolutely beautiful. 


 

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Sunday, September 28th, 2008
5:50 pm - Did McCain say "Horseshit" during the debate?


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5:26 pm - SNL does Palin again

The really sad part:  When "Kouric" asks "Palin" about the bailout, the first part of her response is a direct quote from the actual interview. 

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